Final Days of Fifth Grade

Franklin Elementary School has been home to Teddy for the past 6 years. After spending his 3K and 4K years at two different schools, we were excited to settle into Franklin Elementary School for the foreseeable future. Though I was disappointed at the time (OK, I recall sobbing hysterically) to learn that Teddy wouldn't be at the same school as his older brother, Teddy was meant for Franklin.

This little guy started kindergarten wrapped in love and support.

As I searched back in time to find pictures of the early years, I was reminded of so many memories and milestones. Though I'm sure I'll miss some important events or notes, here's some of the highlights:

1. Teddy's first field trip (and all the subsequent ones). His kindergarten teacher set the bar high for inclusion, and I loved witnessing Teddy with his friends. (I also loved when I realized the school would send paraprofessionals with Teddy, so I didn't have to chaperone every field trip. Sorry not sorry for letting them attend plays with Teddy instead of me!)
2. Birthday party invitations and the chance to hang out with friends outside of school. Teddy made his first close friend on the bus, followed by others. Now Teddy's friend Brad is his only friend who will be at his new middle school. The two of them are wonderful friends, and it's so fun to see them hang out together.
3. The power of advocacy. I witnessed that in his kindergarten year when I shared my feelings on this blog, only to have them read by others in the school and then I heard from the principal. I learned valuable lessons about channeling my advocacy first to the appropriate channels and then determining how much I shared here. But I did learn that asking and advocating will open doors like the next one.
4. Teddy's first concert. He wasn't included his kindergarten year, so we engaged his team to make sure he was included every other year. In fact, he even played the ukelele at his final concert this year!
5. Elopement. This experience was surreal (particularly the circumstances unfolding when I heard firsthand what happened the next day) and is irrefutable proof that Teddy has a whole team of guardian angels (who apparently all took a break at the same moment). We got darn lucky this day, and I don't think it's something his team will ever forget. While it still didn't get 1:1 support for Teddy, it did put in place 1:1 support when outside of the school building in a safety plan. Though that safety plan never got tested fully right away because ...
6. A global pandemic shut down all schools for the remainder of the school year. And then we did a modified school year for two entire school years. (Holy cow ... I can't believe we lasted 2 years with that child in a bubble to protect him.) His teacher wore full PPE for that first year (mask, gown, gloves and face shield ... which is just insane to consider now but was so appreciated at the time.
7. A paraprofessional who asked in January or February 2020 whether we ever would be interested in childcare for Teddy, and I answered yes before she finished her question. Because of the global pandemic, she actually stepped in sooner than intended for childcare, moved in with us for a period of time, spent holidays in quarantine with us and became a part of our family. It's weird to know that this wouldn't be the case if Teddy went to any other school.
8. Beautiful art projects, including some of my favorite Christmas ornaments and homemade gifts. It's so wonderful that his team helps him to create these little masterpieces because he is truly proud of the work he brings home. 
9. Fantastic bus drivers and aides. We've made a lifelong friend who commandeered a bus to bring to Teddy during the COVID years to give him his bus fix. These ladies have always watched out for Teddy, and I've always rested easy when Teddy was in their care.
10. A DARE and 5th grade graduation ceremony where he scampered up to get his DARE certificate ... and then tried to run away in the opposite direction. After a break from sitting (riding on his chariot of a bike), he came back for the 5th grade promotion. Yet he was very particular about the magnetic toys and organizing them back in the box, so his teacher had to physically redirect him to get his certificate. Yet afterward, his teacher commented twice on how good Teddy did. Not only did that make me chuckle, it also makes me wonder what most school days look like.

Now he's a big 5th grader celebrating graduation with his amazing teacher.

This school has been home to Teddy for 6 years. While we're so excited for the opportunities in middle school and think it'll be amazing for him, it's bittersweet to say goodbye to Franklin Elementary. As I mentioned above, only one of his classmates will be joining him at his new middle school (the downfall of not being placed at our home school that feeds into our home middle school). This is one of the bitter parts because all the kids at Franklin, every grade, know Teddy by name, and most are excited to see him. I watched the kids at graduation cheer extra loud and give extra high fives to the kids like Teddy and the ones who need a bit more love (like the little boy who immigrated this year from Africa knowing no English ... funny story, Teddy's universal language of gestures and smiles convinced this kid to join him on the carpet when everyone was supposed to be sitting at their desks ... still makes me chuckle.)

This week will be a hard one for me, as mom, to let go of the elementary years. Right now it's less about the uncertainty of middle school and more about the sadness of leaving behind the friends, teachers and support staff who have embraced Teddy fully for who he is, helped him be his best and loved him (most moments at least when he wasn't testing those boundaries). 

Birth to Three

Before Teddy turned one, we were referred to our county's Birth to Three program, which is the early intervention program in Wisconsin. I distinctly recall the first assessment where Teddy was his happy Teddy self to be assessed by three pretty ladies but supported himself similar to Jello without a mold. We were happy to have some supports in place for Teddy and to receive direction on how to best help him, but we were also nervous because this was our first foray into any type of supports beyond medical visits.

For me, it served as a reality check that my child qualified for supports. (Let's just say he didn't barely squeak through the screening requirements ... there was no doubt he qualified.) It was hard to read the first reports that showed how significant his delays were in each and every area, barely registering at all on at least one of the scales. As heartbreaking as those reports were, we were also excited to see what Birth to Three would do for Teddy.

As it turns out, Birth to Three became perhaps one of my favorite therapy visits, if for no other reason than these appointments were the easiest. Teddy's team came to our house. At first, I worried about having a clean house and eventually settled on a house with the toys mostly picked up in the room where we'd play ... most of the time ... then some of the time. These appointments carried the least amount of stress because the team always asked if there was anything else we needed and often pointed us to resources we didn't know existed.

My absolute favorite part, though, was how excited they were for each and every one of Teddy's accomplishments. It felt like his outpatient therapists were pleased when he hit a goal but immediately set a new one. I understand that's what funding requires, but I just wanted to enjoy the moment. Birth to Three was where it was pure celebration for that day instead of "Here's his next goal."

When I look back at his first Individual Family Support Plan, I read his first goals we set for him: to support himself while hiking in a backback carrier, highchair or sled with AJ's assistance. Teddy got himself into a sitting position independently the first time on his first birthday, and how far he's come since then. I remember him slumping to the side in his highchair and re-positioning him multiple times each meal to an upright position. Now, this same little boy is walking nearly across a room by himself.

When Teddy's Birth to Three team asked if we had any questions on his last meeting before his birthday, my reply was, "Can't we pretend he's not turning three?" They laughed, but we all felt the same way. They've been some of Teddy's biggest supporters, but in a month he's off to school to see what other amazing things he can do.